Give up Beer, Fishing, Golf and Sex

Discussion in 'Station Wagon Lounge' started by tbirdsps, Mar 9, 2012.

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  1. tbirdsps

    tbirdsps New Member Charter Member

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    A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.

    The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"

    "No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

    "Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.

    "No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

    "Will you spend this on greens' fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.

    "Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"

    "Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.

    "What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.

    "Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

    The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

    The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf and sex."
     
    tbirdsps, Mar 9, 2012
    #1
  2. dutchys68belairwagon

    dutchys68belairwagon New Member

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    :lolup::biglaugh::biglaugh:
     
    dutchys68belairwagon, Mar 9, 2012
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  3. Xavier

    Xavier Classic Goth

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    :lolup: :clap: :rofl2: :rofl2: :clap: :lolup:
     
    Xavier, Mar 9, 2012
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  4. Krash Kadillak

    Krash Kadillak Well-Known Member

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    Good one. I always send these on to by B-I-L.....
     
    Krash Kadillak, Mar 9, 2012
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  5. 65 2dr

    65 2dr Fix 'em all -

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    I like it!
     
    65 2dr, Mar 9, 2012
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  6. ModelT1

    ModelT1 Still Lost in the 50's

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    :rofl2::rofl2::yahoo:given up beer, fishing, golf and sex."
    I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting

    __________________
    My wife sees that man every morning when she wakes up!:cry:
     
    ModelT1, Mar 9, 2012
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  7. Xavier

    Xavier Classic Goth

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    Don't play golf,and sadly I haven't been fishing since my dad was alive. But the other two... If you ever hear of a midwest, blue haired mass murderer then you know I have given up beer and sex...

    :D
     
    Xavier, Mar 9, 2012
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  8. ModelT1

    ModelT1 Still Lost in the 50's

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    Not necessarily in that order ? Thanks for the warning!
     
    ModelT1, Mar 9, 2012
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  9. Xavier

    Xavier Classic Goth

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    You're welcome. :)
     
    Xavier, Mar 9, 2012
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  10. fannie

    fannie Well-Known Member

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    :29: you too!:rofl2:
     
    fannie, Mar 9, 2012
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  11. Xavier

    Xavier Classic Goth

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    ... Me??? I'm lost again.
     
    Xavier, Mar 9, 2012
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  12. 1tireman

    1tireman Well-Known Member

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    :biglaugh::biglaugh::biglaugh:
     
    1tireman, Mar 9, 2012
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  13. fannie

    fannie Well-Known Member

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    OOPS!

    [​IMG]

    Sorry, typo...:rofl2:


    Should have read...

    "You two...:rofl2:"


    I meant that you and Cat are amusing. :yup: That's all.
     
    fannie, Mar 9, 2012
    #13
  14. straycat12

    straycat12 Well-Known Member

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    :49: :D :rofl2::lolup:
     
    straycat12, Mar 9, 2012
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  15. ModelT1

    ModelT1 Still Lost in the 50's

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    Now I'm lost ![​IMG]:rofl2::rofl2::rofl2::biglaugh::biglaugh:
    The only golf I've ever played is that mini golf stuff. I don't fish as much as I used to. Don't drink too much beer. And don't remember what that other thing is!
     
    ModelT1, Mar 10, 2012
    #15
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