A police officer pulls over a speeding car. The officer says, ' I clocked you at 80 miles per hour, sir.' The driver says, 'Gee, officer I had it on cruise control at 60, perhaps your radar gun needs calibrating.' Not looking up from her knitting the wife says: 'Now don't be silly dear, you know that this car doesn't have cruise control.' A s the officer writes out the ticket, the driver looks over at his wife and growls, 'Can't you please keep your mouth shut for once?' The wife smiles demurely and says, 'You should be thankful your radar detector went off when it did.' As the officer makes out a second ticket for the illegal radar detector unit fitted in the car he had just pulled over, the man glowers at his wife and says through clenched teeth, 'Dangit, woman, can't you keep your mouth shut?' The officer frowns and says, 'And I notice that you're not wearing your seat belt, sir. That's an automatic $75 fine.' The driver says, 'Yeah, well, you see officer, I had it on, but took it off when you pulled me over so that I could get my license out of my back pocket.' The wife says, 'Now, dear, you know very well that you didn't have your seat belt on. You never wear your seat belt when you're driving.' And as the police officer is writing out the third ticket the driver turns to his wife and barks, 'WHY DON'T YOU PLEASE SHUT UP??' The officer looks over at the woman and asks, 'Does your husband always talk to you this way, Ma'am?' 'Only when he's been drinking.'
Next time the hubby complains about my driving, I'll tell him he can drive then I'll start to tell him of this funny joke I heard.
My wife is the best city driver I've ever known, but she won't drive an automatic! This gal can tool around Monterrey, Mexico or Guadalajara like a cab driver with a stick shift. She's driven to Houston, Dallas, even on her trips to Paris and Rome. Mention automatic and you just know that its safer to feed her with a slingshot. The funny thing is, she doesn't want me to install a manual trans in our wagon.
Hey! I just got an inspiration! You should give your hubby the Behemoth handle and you take the Be-She-Butterfly handle. We all know what happens to moths.
