Driving and drinking

Since the Christmas holidays are fast approaching, and you may be attending festivities where alcohol might be served, I would like to share an experience with you about drinking and driving.
As you well know, some of us have been known to have had brushes with the authorities on our way home from the odd social session over the years.
A couple of nights ago, I was out for a few drinks with some friends and colleagues. I had a few too many wines, a few shots and some rather nice single malt. Knowing full well I may have been slightly over the limit, I did something I've never done before -
I took a bus home. I arrived back safely and without incident, which was a real surprise since I had never driven a bus before and am not sure where I got this one.

 

heheheh,, wayyy tooo funny, D .....

 

One of the things I dislike about my otherwise fantastic Mercury is that it lacks some important modern safety features.
Cupholders, for example.
When I'm sloshed, it can be very difficult to drive and make drunk cellphone calls to ex girlfriends without spilling my drink.
Obviously not very safe. But you may have hit upon a solution!
This "bus" you speak of;
In profile, it does, somewhat, resemble a station wagon.
I have to have my waggin' style when I'm partyin'.
I have heard that some of those 'busses' even have their own restrooms!
But I need to know about cupholders.
And where the spare keys are kept.
Feel free to PM me if the authorities will allow you access to the internets....

 

What about the passengers... how much $ did you make?

 

CMU Cat!!
I just read an article the other day saying something like 23% of all motor vehicle accidents are alcohol related. Hmm, so I guess that means 77% of the drivers were stone cold sober and only 23% a bit tiddly. Sounds to me like you'd have a 77% chance of getting into a wreck if you haven't been drinking and the chances are down to 23% if you've had a cocktail or two.
Honey, pass me another beer before the toll booth, would ya?

 

Yawl can laff about it all you want and make jokes about driving home drunk and not knowing how the hell you made it there ... well I have alittle secret and that is you all (and I) probably owe our presense on earth today to Dr Elbert Botts ..... a fellow Californian of highest esteem.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Botts'_dots


.... this explains why my knuckles have always been all bloodied when I woke the next day after a night of drinking .... dragging them (the knuckles) on the pavement ... feeling for those little dots leading to my house!

 

Should have a number on it somewhere...? If no one claims it you have a sweet mobile chicken coop. :2_thumbs_up_-_anima

 

Hey, cat....how much you want for the bus??

 

I had problems parkin that bus in my garage. So this year I'm "takin" a cab.

Seriously drinkin and driving is not a joking matter.
Cup holders? You don't need no stinkin cup holders. Just keep the bottle between your legs. It's handier there.
I didn't take a bus with people in it. Whata ya think I'm stupid?
FACT: One out of every four people on the road has been drinking. So when you pull up to a fourway stop you better hope those other three are sober!

 

True story. Would I lie to you?

We were pulling out of a parking spot at Wally World near where we live. Right in the main isle in front of me a truck was stopped blocking traffic in several directions. Driver was waiting for his lovely lady to unhook her seatbelt. kiss him, take two pills, and wash them down with----a bottle of beer! She replaced the bottle on the floor where she had gotten it. Right in broad daylight in front of others!
So I figure I was fairly safe knowing that me and two others were sober in that parking lot!
Can you say redneck?

 

I saw a episode of "Cops" once, filmed in Florida. The young mequito-bit man just beat up his woman and as the officer is handcuffing him he says, "Mark, dammnit how many times have I told you its against the law to beat up on your woman?"

... Mark replies, "Its OK .... I am married to her now!"

 

That might have been Mark driving the pick up in Wal Mart !
From the police friends I have here the two biggest things they are kept busy with are wife beaters and drunks. Third must be drugs.
Or drug pushin drunkin wife beaters without license! We left Illinois to get away from crime......... We sure did good!

 

I live in a small community called Alton, Louisiana. It is on the outskirts of Slidell and border of Pearl River, Louisiana. Slidell is a fast growing town and Pearl River is a town that is still behind times and has a reputation of domestic violence so my friends get a laugh when I irratate thier wife or girlfriend and they threaten to hit me, I always reply " We are in Pearl River...That is foreplay!"

 

Danged you're ornery 1tireman. I'd never do that!
HA HA!

 

Drinking, driving, foreplay... Time to find a place to park the car me thinks.